Tuesday, January 22, 2008

The Wheels are Officially Off

I am the epitome of seasonal.

All those seasonal end-caps, rounders, displays and catalogs are right up my alley.

I get bored quickly to say the least. In fact, let's all step back and consider the miracle that I am still interested in blogging after a few months.

Lately, I'm barely interested, but that's ok...I forge ahead publishing nothingness with the best of them.

So anyway, I need a new look for the blog.

It's killing me.

This template was lovely circa 2005 when I wrote my first post. However, it is growing tiresome.

Unfortunately, I can't go down to my basement and rummage through unpacked moving boxes for accessories to liven things up. That's my usual tactic for home-decor blahs around here.

The other day, I spent several hours wandering around the basement, digging through random boxes, desperately searching for some Valentine's happiness to display. I didn't replace all of the towels with pink and red ones or put those plastic-y, removable, peely, things on my windows (clearly, the actual word for what they are has totally escaped my overloaded Helmet. Help, please help.)

Anyway, a few candy dishes, a small wreath and a few serving plates later, I felt like a new person.

Oh, and a few bags of pink and red M&M's also helped. In both dark chocolate and peanut. And Hot Tamales. And Hershey kisses. And a batch of cookie dough with toasted pecans, chocolate chips, oatmeal and peanut butter helped.

But don't worry...I'm not an emotional eater. It was all of 6 degrees outside and I needed to rev my metabolism to keep warm. Absolutely.

So back to the blog. I need a blog decorator.

Someone with good taste, intelligence, and an ability to understand computers.

I am very challenged in that area.

The other day, I was almost in tears as I told Brad, "My brand new digital camera is already broken! I am nothing but POISON to all things electronic!"

"Have you charged the battery since you got the camera?"

"Huh?"

"Just a thought."

His patience is downright admirable.

I am pretty sure that I could crash a computer just thinking about the hard drive.

Anyway, I've searched for photos, clip art, something resembling anything to put on the blog. To no avail.

So if any of y'all know blog decorators, HOOK. ME. UP. I don't need some "designer" that is very sleek and modern. Because in case you haven't noticed, there is nothing sleek and modern about me. But if you know someone who does puffy and retro, we might be in business.

I can give a vivid and most darling description of what I want the blog to look like. I JUST CAN'T DO IT, CAPTAIN! I DON'T HAVE THE POWER! (Name that movie...)

I believe that if someday, I was sentenced to time in a jail cell, my primal decorating urges would cause me to carve some adorable etchings in the wall, use toilet paper to craft papier mache sculptures, and fashion play clothes out of the jailhouse curtains. Oh wait, my dreams just intersected and that's the one where my governess is Fraulein Maria and I sing my way through town while laughing at my brother's lederhosen.

(Cue music)

Which brings us back to Dec-or-a-ting.

3 comments:

Chelsea said...

I've seen quite a few blogs that are designed by Swank Web Style Design Studio. Not mine unfortunately. I have a boring blogger layout.

ashlan said...

So, I just love your blog, it's hilarious. I found it one day when I was reading Kimberly and Beau's. I know them through The Village Church. I am a student at the University of North Texas, and sometimes to keep me distracted from doing homework I like to read your blog. Thanks for making me laugh. Anyway I ran across this other blog, and she does "blog makeovers" for free. She holds drawings for the winners.
Just thought I would let you know.

Here's the link:
http://fabulouskblogdesigns.blogspot.com/

Lisa @ Take90West said...

I think the word you may be looking for would be 'window cling'
but thank goodness you didn't put any of them up!
I'm sure you've seen all of the expensive designers out there, but for 25 bucks you should check out
www.jennisajoy.blogspot.com although, she is not very retro, more scrapbooky.
Another blog banner designer is www.krislhurst.blogspot.com she is really retro, but I'm not sure if it is the kind of retro you're in to.
She does different designs quite often for a blog I read called www.alas3lads.blogspot.com and they always look good.
Wish I could whip one up myself fo you, but no mad blogger skillz for me!