It's Pretty Much the Plastic Soccer Statue of Blogging

If you could see me right now, you'd know I am typing in a beautiful, golden, sparkly formal dress complete with heels and one of those purses so small and fancy that it doesn't actually hold anything except enough lip gloss to make a mess when I drop it in my lap.

Actually, I am in some old jeans and a (formerly) white hoodie with pumpkin bread batter on the sleeves. Oh yeah.

But good news!

Queen B, who is a real blogger and not even someone I pay to read the blog, has passed along a very special award. She was dazzled with my kreativity and frequent references to food. 

Ta da:

In exchange for this award (who has ever heard of an award with strings attached?) I have to tell six things that make me happy.

And I'm going to attempt to do this without mentioning friends and family, because of course they make me happier than anything and it would consume the majority of this post and my tears might cause water damage to the laptop.

And I am already at my quota for water-damaged technology this year. 

1. Clean sheets. I love everything about them and if I could wash and change my sheets every day, I would.

This is somewhat ironic, because although I am the washer of the sheets, I am not allowed to put them on the bed because I do it "wrong."

So wrong, in fact, that last time, Brad wouldn't even let me be in the same room with him while he put them on the bed. He thought I would "try to help and mess things up like usual."

I could either a) have my feelings hurt, or b) rejoice in the fact that I never have to make my bed.

2. Coffee. My love for coffee is dark-roasted, strong, and hot. Sometimes I get excited to go to bed, knowing that I am that much closer to waking up and being filled with warmth.

2a. Coffee creamer. My current favorite is Cinnamon Bun and I am rotating it with Hazelnut Biscotti and Eggnog. I like them with a little Splenda to round out my artificial flavors and fake chemical intake by 6 a.m.

2c. I do not like iced coffee. See #5.

3. A perfectly relaxing afternoon: Putting on a great movie and settling in to bake and cook uninterrupted for a few hours.

This has happened approximately once in my entire life.

A girl can dream.

4. Black Friday Shopping

And yes, I would say this even if it wasn't coming up in FOUR DAYS OH MY GOSH. 

I am already fantasizing about my 6 a.m. Peppermint Mocha, unbelievable deals, a cozy lunch, and family fun along with the rest of America. 

Oh, and I also like shopping the other 364 days of the year.

5. Being warm.

I don't care if it's at a beach (preferable), because of seat warmers (high-maintenance, but true) or thanks to my mattress-pad warmer (best gift EVER.)

But I love heat. I would rather sweat to death than freeze, thank you very much.

And I start to freeze at about 79 degrees.

Which is only about 20 degrees different than Brad's freezing point.

Good times.

6. Running.

I am not a glutton for punishment, but I do love a good, long run. 

I love breathing in cool air outside and how the monotony of the steps puts my body on cruise control, freeing my mind to pray, think, and organize (I use that term loosely.)

I've said it once and I'll say it again, I've never regretted going for a run, but I almost always regret skipping one.

(That's it for Deep Thoughts in 2008).

Ok, the last string to this Kreativ Award is that I have to pass it along.

I'm passing it right along to Jules at The Roost.

She is amazingly gentle and humble and hilarious and full of truth all at the same time. And if you haven't met Mr. Perfect...well, you should.

Thanks again, QB!

Blog Makeover Giveaway

As you know, there's nothing I love more than ANYTHING that's FREE!

(Although Chick-fil-A discontinued their Free Breakfast Tuesdays, so I am standing in the kitchen wondering What On Earth I will eat and can I possibly make a Chicken Biscuit at home?)

And my very special blog designer, Jenny, is at it again!

She's hosting a giveaway at her site for a free blog makeover for you AND a friend! How fun is that?

Head over to her website to check out her amazing designs...you'll be hooked! If your blog already has a design you love, you can enter to win for a friend, add buttons, or get a re-design.

It's kind of like summer tank tops or ice cream--you can never have enough variations!

It's also like exclamation marks in this post! You! Can't! Ever! Have! Enough!

Why I Blog

A Short Essay That May or May Not Bore You to Tears

Ever since a Blogging Peep posed the question a few weeks ago, I've been pondering why I blog. Silly to ask myself, probably, but it did stop and make me think.

I know why I started blogging: desperation.

And not the kind you think. I didn't need an escape or another community, support or a creative outlet. (Because you know I am fine being totally uncreative and just eating cookies and hanging out with friends and going to happy hour at Sonic a few--or several--times a week.)

It was desperation to simply share our lives with people we love.

Although Colorado is currently "home," it's not really home. It's where we live. 

It's Far, Far Away (we just watched Shrek) from both of our families.

Chicago, Texas, North Carolina, to name a few.

FAR.

And I am probably the worst keeper-in-toucher you could imagine. 

So, realizing my gross inadequacy at sending pictures via email, writing short updates capturing Jackson and Lilly's latest craziness, and after failing to keep people informed as to our lives in general, I decided to start a blog.

I hesitated because it feels so impersonal.

I would rather write a detailed email or send a letter via snail mail. But it just doesn't get done.

Having a few anecdotes out there on the blog feels selfish. Like I am too busy to make contact with each of you, but if you make the effort to come to me, I'll be here!

You come to me! Ugh.

And even then, it is still such a small piece of our lives.

Someone in the blogosphere (I can't remember whom or I would give them credit) described the blog as a mere sliver of pie. 

With each post, people get a teeny slice of our lives. Not even close to the whole pie--the full picture of who we are, what our days are like, and of course, the many endeavors that we choose to withhold from the entire free world with internet access. (Imagine that.)

I started blogging (well for real, that is...there were a few stops and false starts along the way) after my kids were toddlers. Therefore, the big developmental milestones and rapid changes had slowed down considerably by the time I started sharing these snippets with loved ones.

Granted, there are still plenty of amazing and significant moments. But the rapid succession of teething, crawling, walking, and emptying entire drawers in less than ten seconds had passed.

(Praise. God.)

So for whatever reason, I came up with a bunch of other nonsensical "content." 

Shopping.

Coffee.

Home and auto disasters.

Food fantasies and recipes.

Decorating.

Running.

You know, stuff. 

I was told that all of those categories are too broad of a blogging focus and I need to clarify my purpose. 

But that randomness perfectly reflects my multi-tasking, haphazard, no two-days-alike life.

I love how something as small as a latte can make my day, how Lilly's wardrobe decisions crack me up, how Jackson oozes tenderness and ruggedness at the same time, and how shopping is just plain FUN. 

*******Beep beep beepbeepbeep beep***********

Speaking of which, Lilly spent all afternoon in her size 2T Tinkerball pajamas, brown and pink argyle knee socks, and hot pink furry snow boots.

Because she is Lilly.

*******Beep beep beepbeepbeep beep************

As a bonus, I've met and adore the other bloggers out there who share life in such a unique way. I love the fellow moms who share life's small victories, tears, and grand disasters without judgment or condescension.

I love laughing instead of crying (except when I laugh so hard I cry...which is often) and exchanging emails with people I may never meet but I somehow know are kindred spirits. 

(And I am positive they love Anne of Green Gables and Will Ferrell as much as I do.)

I love that our extended family has some clue of what's going on in our lives and that I don't have to keep a scrapbook to document all of the moments (precious and otherwise) that fly in and out of our garage door each day.

(Scrapbooks make me all shaky and tense and I AM AGAINST THEM and poor Lilly doesn't have so much as shreds of paper with dates written on them as to when she hit developmental phases. 

I just remember thinking things like, "That's when Jackson got teeth!" so hopefully she'll never ask.)

But another thing I love about the blog is that it's a place to record the insanely simple and fun daily blessings, giving God glory for each of His good and perfect gifts.

I am thankful beyond words to have some amazing girls in my life with who I regularly share my burdens, struggles, and thorns. We wrestle with tough truths in the Bible while pushing each other to live out our faith, work out our theology, and live sacrificially on a daily basis.

We ask challenging questions and have sworn to spur each other toward the best road...not the easy or even the good path.

However, those are conversations I love having in person. The blog is just not a good way for me to flesh out my convictions. (I really admire those who are brave enough to attempt that.)

I love to read blogs where people argue beliefs and challenge each other's thinking...but I am not ready to jump in on those conversations. I feel too limited, too misunderstood, and like I might have to be articulate or something.

Dude. No can do.

But I do feel that the blog is a great forum to capture the blissfulness and simplicity of my latest finds at the Gap.

It is also a great venue for Hair Talk, The Great Suburban Odyssey, and any and all things food.

I have no idea how many people show up each day to read the brain cell-emptying posts about tank tops and wonder how Brad and I were allowed to leave the hospital with live babies and no parenting license.

But I am so thankful they (YOU!) do. Thank you for the many emails, thank you for the comments, thank you for the encouragement that keeps this humble blog going.

Fo' real, yo.

Love it.

I can't promise I'll be blogging a month or a year from now. But for today it is great.

God has overwhelmed me yet again with grace and goodness in unexpected places.

I can just picture myself in heaven explaining this "blog" business to Moses. He will be picturing stone tablets and shaking his head.

Just like you are right now.

The Quality of the Actual Blogging Will Not Improve

Well, what do you think?!

(A lot of you have already told me, but pretend we are doing this for the first time.)

I had planned a grand unveiling for my new blog design, but my Sweet Toothless Pumpkin stole the show. Jackson woke up with a letter from TTF this morning (doesn't that sound a little more manly for a boy than The Tooth Fairy?) and has been celebrating his ten shiny quarters all day.

(Another advantage of TTF is that he doesn't have a big spending reputation like The Tooth Fairy, so he can give away less dinero.)

(He is also a fluent Spanish speaker.)

Anyway.

This is my big chance to send some bloggy love to Jenny, my fabulous blog designer! As you can tell, she has much talent with the digital scrapbook software as well as technical bloggy know-how.

Since I possess neither of those talents (along with singing and gardening) she and I were a perfect combination.

Also, she is a newlywed and schoolteacher in the same North Texas stomping grounds where I was once a newlywed and schoolteacher.

Kewl.

She's super speedy, a great communicator, and did I mention ARTSY and CREATIVE as all get out? Oh, and REASONABLY PRICED!

That was key for me. I don't want to call her "cheap" because of the obvious implications, but for those of you like me who are blogging along while shielding your eyes from your very own home page because of all The Ugly, Pink Armchair Designs is the answer to your prayers.

*************LIVE BLOGGING UPDATE*****************

Talk to me about this boxing theme on Idol?! What?! I am confused? Would they have shared Syesha's weight with all of America?

The sad part is that I barely care any more, but STILL.

Also.

Is Paula even wearing a top or just a blingy necklace? H-E-L-P!

It's official: Idol has jumped the shark.

************BACK TO THE MEDIOCRITY****************

Well, that's really all. Yea for Jenny!

Also, if Sylvester Stallone appears on Idol tonight, I will die.

Thank you.

Reading Can Take You to Exciting Places! (Like Hollywood)

I have some very exciting news: I am a winner!

And this is way more than a good self-esteem day. I actually won something! For free! Because I can use the internet!

One of my blogging inspirations/friends/peeps, Queen B had a drawing for a book on her site, so I left a very thoughtful, insightful comment and WON! 

(Or it was a random drawing.) 

(Details.)

Since I am literate and in a book group, I thought it might be fun to enter. Plus, she was giving away "Same Kind of Different As Me" which I've really been wanting to read. I've heard several good reviews from actual people I trust, so game on.

Besides bragging on Queen B for being so generous and scholarly, I also thought I'd use this post as a PSA for book groups in general. It might sound intimidating and pressure-packed to join a book group, but that is just a big myth.

In case you're just joining this blog or have grossly misinterpreted everything I've written to date, I am about as low-brow and tabloid-loving as they come. 

That said, Laura Ingalls Wilder and whoever wrote the Babysitter's Club and Sweet Valley Twins developed a love of deep, symbolic literature in my heart sometime around third grade.

Clearly, my passion for fine writing has slowly devolved into a passion for very short articles that contain few big words and much talk about hair products and bookshelf accessorization.

For this reason, I love book group because it forces me to read about 12 books a year. We take turns choosing titles and plow through one book a month.

More accurately, I plow through one book on one day of the month. Ideally, I'd check the book out of the library then slowly savor the dramatic structure, rising action, character development, and use of parallel symbolism while sipping a latte by a roaring fire (or poolside, depending on the season and aquatic ability of my kids.)

Instead, I read/skim the book while ignoring my children and all household duties in order to have the book very fresh on my mind when we convene later that evening in our cardigan sweaters and tortoise shell glasses.

Or sweats. Whatever.

To give you a sample of a book group evening, below are the minutes from one of our typical meetings:

8:00-9:00--Dessert

Honestly, this can make or break a night. There are usually copious amounts of chocolate involved, except when A's husband (who is not even in book group) shamed us all and made sour cream apple pie. I've thought of it almost every night since.

Don't be fooled that we're enjoying casual conversation and catching up on each other's lives during this time. 

We are talking about the dessert we're eating and brainstorming future book group treats.

9:00-9:30--Discussion of Children, Their Sleep Habits, and Various Behavior Issues/Concerns/Abnormalities/Weirdness

This isn't a formal part of the night, but when there are eight moms with 22 kids between us, it's inevitable.

Also, there are many diseases, rashes, tantrums, and bodily functions that must be discussed. 

Because.

9:30-9:45--Mention of the Book We Read (Or Didn't Finish Reading)

9:45-11:00--Miscellaneous Discussion

This portion of the evening probably doesn't need much elaboration. Let's just say I know these girls very well.

And this is where we get a good dose of aerobics because without fail, we laugh to the point of tears. Again and again and again.

The girls are hysterical beyond your wildest imagination and a few are even good with sight gags.

What happens in book group, stays in book group.

11:00-Midnight--You Tube Videos

This is where things really get out of hand and we are hovering around a smallish computer while sharing at the latest YouTube madness that nearly causes bladder issues because of all the laughing.

Epilogue:

Book groups--they are great. Especially if you don't have time to read.

Post-Epilogue:

I'm listing several of the books we've read over the past few years in the sidebar. At least the ones I can remember.

Seven Things

So I have been racking my brain trying to come up with seven interesting things about myself to share with those who read this blog. And if I'm honest, I've got a big bag of nothing.

But since that has never stopped me before, I type on...

1) I love camp. Not camping. Never camping. Camp.

Being a camper as a kid and a camp counselor in college were both amazing. As a camper, I'd call home after being away for two weeks, BEGGING to stay another two. I just couldn't get enough of all the fun, pranks, activities, snacks (you knew it involved food), and friends.

And being a camp counselor is probably my favorite job of all times. Why I was entrusted with other people's 9 year-olds for two weeks is beyond me, but we sure had a good time together and laughed ourselves silly.

Even though I am all about sitting in Panera with my laptop and sipping a latte by the roaring fire, I am also all about being dirty, not showering, and sabotaging other people's cabins, then waiting for the favor to be returned. Such fun.

But camping? I don't mind the eating out of tin cans and sleeping on sharp rocks. What I mind is that I can't stop thinking wild animals that don't belong anywhere near me are suddenly going to attack. I don't want ants or bugs crawling on me while I sleep, bears circling the tent, or fish so much as peacefully swimming in a nearby pond. If a ladybug so much as crosses my path three feet ahead, I'm out.

2. My favorite sports are baseball and golf. LOVEY LOVE LOVE them both.

They are a) warm in nature, b) intense, but not paint-your-face intense, and c) involve some of my favorite concessions.

3. I have a knack for losing big-ticket items. I am not proud of this, but it is who I am. 

Brad thought it might be "fun" to post the highest-dollar item I've lost. Well, I couldn't possibly do that to him or my parents, because the memories it conjures are downright painful.

But I will say that I had to have my entire college dorm re-keyed more than once and it is NOT CHEAP to buy new keys for like 500 girls.

4. I am not a "shoe" person. Love my flops. Love my running shoes. The End.

The rest of the year I limp by in out-of-style black or brown shoes. But mostly running shoes. Because I would rather spend money on 10 lattes than  having a pair of shoes. 

Because shoes are not edible.

5. It's taking everything in me to come up with seven things that don't all involve food. Because it is what I love. The buying, the making, the ordering, the dreaming about, and drumroll...THE EATING. 

Food is like my children in that I couldn't possibly come up with a favorite because they are all so unique in their characteristics, so wonderful, interesting, and just tasty in a way that quenches both my soul and tastebuds.

What I don't like is bad food. There are few foods I don't care for, but if something isn't fixed well or dry or wet or crunchy or soggy or whatever it shouldn't be, I can't do it. 

I have had four perfectly golden chocolate chip cookies cooked in a cast iron skillet, served sizzling hot, partially cooked inside, topped with ice cream and chocolate sauce in the last 10 days.

Is that a problem?

6. I have strong feelings about the pronunciation of certain words.

Syrup.

Pecan.

Pajamas.

I will not tell you the correct pronunciations according to me because I don't want to hurt any feelings. Just know I am cringing inside when you don't say it right.

My favorite word in the English language is "swarthy." I just LOVE it.

7. My dream invention is called The Starbucks Mobile. It drives up and down my street each morning (like an ice cream truck) and stops out front so I can get a Skinny Mocha at approximately 6:30 a.m.

There are so many mornings I need a fix, but can't justify loading up the kids and myself in full Mismatched Pajama Regalia to hit the Starbucks that is five minutes from my house before shuttling everyone out the door to school. The nearest drive-thru is about 20 minutes away and I'd be lying if I said I'd never driven that far just to have everyone physically restrained while I drank my vanilla latte in peace.

(I let Brad unbuckle to drink his hot chocolate.)

So there you have it. Seven things.

I'm not really sure who to tag because many of the blogs I read are people who get THOUSANDS of comments and I'm not sure Pioneer Woman would know my email isn't spam. And really, people like me tagging her for memes probably IS spam.

But I love my blogging friends, so if you want to share Seven Absolutely Fascinating Things go right on ahead. I will be reading and loving it.

It's a Wonder I Get Anything Done

I've been busy lately. For real.

Usually I am busy in a way that leaves me time to blog about all of the things I should be doing while I accomplish nothing other than writing a blog to six or perhaps seven people who have in all likelihood, stopped checking my blog because of the rarity of my posts.

This time however, I've (get ready...) ACTUALLY BEEN DOING THINGS!

Like laundry!

Like "organizing"!

Like eating a whole bunch of zucchini muffins!

Anyway, I've been wanting to blog about why I'm not blogging, which is really a roundabout way of telling you what I have been doing. I know, A+ for cleverness.

This is where I feel led to tell you about my "organizing." I have no choice but to put it in quotes because if there is one word in the English language that in no way describes me, it would be "organized." ("Organized" is tied for first with "delicate" and "reserved" but that is neither here nor there.)

My favorite part of any "organizational" project is shopping for and purchasing the supplies. You know, notebooks, labels, label makers, markers, pencils, bins, baskets, etc. Spending hours daydreaming about being "organized" in Office Max is right up my alley.

Spending hours actually organizing followed by a lifetime of staying organized makes me want to just throw everything away.

The reason for the recent project is that a very special piece of furniture in our house is no longer with us. Brad and I graciously offered to babysit our friends' armoire while they were in transition between apartment and house.

Here is the object of my sorrow:
Not this exact one, but you get the idea. It was in our bedroom, housing the TV and most of my desk "files" and "folders." Well, these precious friends moved and demanded it right back.

Not wanting to set the TV on the floor, thus obscuring our nightly viewing of "Jon and Kate+8," Brad gave generously of his time and sizable woodworking talents to create a suitable replacement made out of two by fours and a folding table.

He has also been taking decorating tips from me because he threw in a splash of color to hide the unsightly table legs.

That's klassy with a "k," for sure.

I love how he chose a delightful autumn tablecloth that puddles ever so slightly on the left side. The asymmetrical look of the 80's is not reserved only for clothing. Vern Yip would be proud.

In case you were wondering, that's a custom TV stand crafted out of the finest pieces of wood money can find in our basement.

I've always wanted a piece of "furniture" that simultaneously reminds me of an abandoned dorm room and a free electronics giveaway. One minute I am blogging about filling each tiny space of our house with beautiful things and the next I am a set of blocks and rusty sedan away from becoming the Clampetts. Pride apparently comes before the fall .

The real problem is not just that this bedroom storage "solution" is unsightly...it's that a folding table and see-thru TV stand provide no real storage for the 1,000 papers that remind me about things like birthday parties and teacher conferences that I've missed.

So then, we set up my desk as combined Entertainment/Home Office space:

I'm sure Ballard Designs will be featuring us and our creative, yet cute ideas in their next catalog.

Here is the thing: even though I am an "organizational" nightmare, I can't work amidst mess. I can't sleep with the computer humming or with papers scattered all over the place.

Which is why things got really hairy when we created the Entertainment/Home Office/Exercise Arena and Open Storage Areas:

That way I can mix in a few lunges and crunches with some Bible verse memory and paper "filing."

It took several days to find drawers with vacancy grand enough in which to stuff a year's worth of papers from preschool and kindergarten. Surprisingly, my paper overflow decreased substantially when I weeded out the book order forms from September and grocery receipts from 2006.

We are still mourning the beloved armoire that we knew and loved as our own for several months, but I have begun a mighty prayer campaign that it might be replaced before next fall when I need that table cloth and have to replace it with my Christmas table runners.

The Wheels are Officially Off

I am the epitome of seasonal.

All those seasonal end-caps, rounders, displays and catalogs are right up my alley.

I get bored quickly to say the least. In fact, let's all step back and consider the miracle that I am still interested in blogging after a few months.

Lately, I'm barely interested, but that's ok...I forge ahead publishing nothingness with the best of them.

So anyway, I need a new look for the blog.

It's killing me.

This template was lovely circa 2005 when I wrote my first post. However, it is growing tiresome.

Unfortunately, I can't go down to my basement and rummage through unpacked moving boxes for accessories to liven things up. That's my usual tactic for home-decor blahs around here.

The other day, I spent several hours wandering around the basement, digging through random boxes, desperately searching for some Valentine's happiness to display. I didn't replace all of the towels with pink and red ones or put those plastic-y, removable, peely, things on my windows (clearly, the actual word for what they are has totally escaped my overloaded Helmet. Help, please help.)

Anyway, a few candy dishes, a small wreath and a few serving plates later, I felt like a new person.

Oh, and a few bags of pink and red M&M's also helped. In both dark chocolate and peanut. And Hot Tamales. And Hershey kisses. And a batch of cookie dough with toasted pecans, chocolate chips, oatmeal and peanut butter helped.

But don't worry...I'm not an emotional eater. It was all of 6 degrees outside and I needed to rev my metabolism to keep warm. Absolutely.

So back to the blog. I need a blog decorator.

Someone with good taste, intelligence, and an ability to understand computers.

I am very challenged in that area.

The other day, I was almost in tears as I told Brad, "My brand new digital camera is already broken! I am nothing but POISON to all things electronic!"

"Have you charged the battery since you got the camera?"

"Huh?"

"Just a thought."

His patience is downright admirable.

I am pretty sure that I could crash a computer just thinking about the hard drive.

Anyway, I've searched for photos, clip art, something resembling anything to put on the blog. To no avail.

So if any of y'all know blog decorators, HOOK. ME. UP. I don't need some "designer" that is very sleek and modern. Because in case you haven't noticed, there is nothing sleek and modern about me. But if you know someone who does puffy and retro, we might be in business.

I can give a vivid and most darling description of what I want the blog to look like. I JUST CAN'T DO IT, CAPTAIN! I DON'T HAVE THE POWER! (Name that movie...)

I believe that if someday, I was sentenced to time in a jail cell, my primal decorating urges would cause me to carve some adorable etchings in the wall, use toilet paper to craft papier mache sculptures, and fashion play clothes out of the jailhouse curtains. Oh wait, my dreams just intersected and that's the one where my governess is Fraulein Maria and I sing my way through town while laughing at my brother's lederhosen.

(Cue music)

Which brings us back to Dec-or-a-ting.

Merry Linking to You!

Seems like there's a bloggy tradition out there that when you get to your 100th post, the blogger posts 100 things about herself. Anything I could potentially list past number 7 would have people crying tears of boredom and they'd be begging for internet.com to just blow up and put them out of their misery.

Do y'all really want to know that I've had my left eardrum replaced twice and that it hurt MUCH worse than birthing a ten-pound child without the aid of a c-section?

Or that I took have strong feelings about the pronunciation of the word "pecan?"

Or that I dearly loved "American Gladiators" and will gladly watch it again if it comes back on TV and would consider trying out to be a challenger?

See, I teased you with absolutely mind-numbing facts to prove my point.

Instead, I thought I'd put some links to some other great blogs I read because many of these folks are quasi-professionals and say things with greater wit and creativity than I could dream of. Much better than reading about when I triple-pierced my own ears in high school, right?

As a disclaimer (and with no offense intended to the bloggers I'm about to mention) I am not exactly riveted by thought-provoking material. In case you thought you might be linking to some great conversations about world peace, global warming, and discussions of the New York Times OpEd page, just remember that I am easily amused by eating and sleeping.

First off, Big Mama. Melanie boldly says what some others are afraid to: Christmas sweaters are OUT. OUT. OUT.

And I commented on her site in order to agree with her, so I shall share it with you. When there are fraternity theme parties and parties throughout the neighborhood with themes like "Ugly Christmas Sweaters" you know it is time to fold it up and put it away.

Of course, that didn't stop many parishioners yesterday at church from sporting their Christmas finery. But just because you OWN something doesn't mean you have to WEAR that something. Brad and I have that conversation almost weekly when he wants to get out his Ron Jon Surf Shop shirt and tool around town.

Next, are you reading Confessions of a Pioneer Woman?! Well, you really should be. She is funny, smart, and amazingly talented with a camera. Plus, she takes pictures of things the rest of us can't photograph everyday like her beautiful horses (can you believe I am loving her animals?), Marlboro Man, and her ranch.

She also has a site about cooking, which I've come to LOVE. She makes delicious, down-home recipes (I don't believe there's a lot of gourmet fixins available near the ranch) and they are just delicious.

Speaking of food: Smitten Kitchen. Deb lives in New York, and the availability of ingredients and inspirations is a little...broader than the Pioneer Woman. Love her food, love her pictures, love her.

Yet another of my favorites is Sophie at Boomama. We are soulmates even though she is not aware of it yet. We were in the same sorority, gave birth to a gigantic child, love decorating, eating/cooking, jeans and laughing at our own stupidity. Here is one of my favorite posts. I wanted to add more, but didn't have time...but I'll just tell you that she had me at "Asian Hooters."

Now, BigMama and BooMama do these things called podcasts which means they call each other on their cellphones and record it for those on the interweb to download. Doesn't that sound just thrilling? Let me just tell you that I have gotten stray glances from nearby treadmills while I am snorting and wiping tears of laughter from my eyes while listening to these two.

I would not say these girls have a wide appeal (Dad, I do not think you'd be interested seeing as I don't know how interested you are in MY blog), but I am certainly in their demographic (women with 4 year-olds who enjoy making purchases at Target) and they just kill me. One of my favorite episodes was when they discussed the perfumes our generation wore in high school. If you could pick out Calvin Klein's CKOne scent blindfolded with one nostril open, you will die laughing.

Oh, and do y'all ever look at Baby Bangs? It's Amanda Jones (Beth Moore's oldest daughter's) blog. You know, my Bible study friends and I are lovers and fans of Beth, so her offspring are of great interest to us. Plus, Amanda is about my age, lives in Dallas, and has a son named Jackson. What else can I say? (Other than please don't tell her that I'm stalking her.)

For the kids, track Santa here.

And if you have a few minutes to focus on Christmas, definitely listen to this. Andy, the pastor at our church in Texas, shared an amazingly impactful advent message yesterday. Really, really good stuff about the first nativity.

So there you have it...some holiday fun for the teeny moment of downtime when you can sneak away for a nap or much needed technology boost.

Merry Christmas!

Christmas Meme

I've been tagged for this meme by Holly...and I hereby tag each one of you Proud Blog Owners to copy and answer these questions on your own blog. IMMEDIATELY. (And then let me know so I can check it out!)

If you have laundry to do, you can thank me right now.

1. Wrapping paper or gift bags?
I am obsessed with wrapping paper.

2. Real tree or artificial?
Fakey fake fake. I am still recovering from our last Real Tree Cut Down Experience. It was two years ago.

3. When do you put up the tree?
Right after Thanksgiving...although I started early this year.

4. When do you take the tree down?
Right after Christmas.

5. Do you like eggnog?
You bet...especially in a latte.

6. Favorite gift received as a child
That's a hard one...either the Cabbage Patch Kid (I am dating myself) or clothes (not much has changed).

7. Do you have a nativity scene?
Yes, and the Little People version is my absolute favorite.

8. Hardest person to buy for?
Brad...he has a love of expensive technology and still fits into clothes from high school. And wears them.

9. Easiest person to buy for?
Kiddos and my brother (he can never have too many collegiate hooded sweatshirts).

10. Worst Christmas gift you ever received?
I would say the Jimmy Buffet "Margaritaville" running outfit that matches my Mom's & Kari's. The colors are a little....tropical...for Colorado but that doesn't stop me from wearing it and pretending I am doing laps around the retirement home pond.

11. Mail or email Christmas cards?
Definitely mail...this is one of my favorite traditions and I have gone so far as to handcraft the cards this year. But if I could find room in the budget, I'd order them from tinyprints.com.

12. Favorite Christmas Movie?
Classics: Miracle on 34th Street (always watched with my mom) and White Christmas. Current: Elf and Christmas Vacation

13. When do you start shopping for Christmas?
I need to get going on that right this minute.

14. Have you ever recycled a Christmas present?
I really don't think so, but I am not opposed to re-gifting in any way.

15. Favorite thing to eat at Christmas?
Well frankly, that is really a whole blog unto itself. But I would say Christmas cookies, chocolate pie, steak, sausage balls, breakfast burritos, rum cake, shrimp, and melted cheese...

16. Clear lights or colored on the tree?
Clear, for now.

17. Favorite Christmas song?
Please do not laugh when I say "Silver Bells" by The Judds.

18. Travel for Christmas or stay at home?
The only Christmas I was "home" was when I was in the hospital with Lilly.

19. Can you name all of Santa's reindeer?
'Course.

20. Angel on the tree top or a star?
Actually, we have a snowman and the children are not happy about it.

21. Open the presents Christmas Eve or morning?
Morning. And I have VERY strong feelings about this.

22. Most annoying thing about this time of year?
Yards "decorated" with inflatable animals and creatures that have nothing to do with Christmas. Ok, fine. ALL INFLATABLES.

23. What I love most about Christmas?
I'm not going to lie: I love to give and receive presents. However...I also love that the kids are able to understand more and more of God's great gift to us each year.

24. Do you believe in Santa Claus?
You know, he is not a real big part of our celebration, but I do like to have fun with it.

I Have Sooooooo Much To Do

I'm taking a break from Vacation Talk to clear the air about my blogging sickness.

More than one well-meaning person has asked me, "So how do you have all this TIME to blog? And on top that, how in heaven's name do you have time to watch ALL THAT TV and then blog about it?"

I can really appreciate those people who are so organized and with it, that when the going gets tough, they make lists! Then they cross stuff off the lists! Ooohhhhh, doesn't that feel good?

To me, it does not. Lists don't motivate me one bit. I feel complete freedom to throw the list in the trash or make a new list the next day of all the Items of Drudgery I was supposed to accomplish the day before.

You know, creativity really starts to flow when you're under pressure.

Think about college...didn't we all have the MOST fun when a huge test was looming, but we'd rather do anything but cave into the pressure and study? And maybe, just maybe, we found out Tom Jones was in concert, so we gathered some delinquent friends and rushed out to buy concert tickets? Maybe we were the only ones there under 60, but we dutifully screamed and hob-nobbed with senior citizens. Who on earth would do something so crazy?

Because hey, if I studied and didn't do well, I didn't have much of an excuse. I was just dumb. But if I was so busy that I couldn't possibly get to the studying, then I had a GREAT excuse for that "C" I just made. (This is very hypothetical, of course.) My calendar was packed! I was very busy seeing Tom Jones Live In Concert so studying was, unfortunately, just not a possibility. Bummer. Maybe next time.

Even now, things don't change one little bit. I barely get a sense of satisfaction from doing the laundry because the minute I attempt to clear out just ONE of the hampers, Someone Small will change clothes for the twelveteenth time that day.

But when I read people's blogs I am totally BUSY and have a reason NOT to attack dishes, dirty floors or whatever other cleaning tasks await me. And if I happen to click over to check the bank account or pay bills, then HEY! I was multi-tasking like CRAZY and couldn't be bothered to re-organized the play room.

Blogging really is for busy people, don't you think?

I've Outsourced Myself

More than once this week, I opened my mouth to share some Must-Know news about our family and the listener stopped me before I had even told them the topic.

"Guess what?!" I always like to grab a friend's attention with a creative intro.

"I already read the blog."

"Buh...And....Uh" My mind quickly searches for any details I may have failed to blog about. But there are none.

You know, the intention of this whole Bloggy Wonderland was mostly for those far away. But being that I have fabulous friends, they all read along too, because they need assurance that I am the least sane among them, which I happily prove with each and every post.

"But there is so much more to me than the blog!" I want to shout. Ok, not really, but I must pretend.

So, here are some things I typically discuss with friends that I have left off the blog:

1. Everything I eat/ate/plan to eat. Even though I have shared a few recipes, it is the tip tip teeny weeny tip of my recipe iceberg. You have NO IDEA how much restraint I'm showing in this department. Thank you, Holy Spirit.

2. Every page of the Pottery Barn catalog.

3. And Pottery Barn Kids.

4. And Southern Living.

5. Hair...how it looks today, how it looked at its best, and my plans for its future. This is usually a lengthy conversation.

6. What Allison wore as host of "The Biggest Loser." Her wardrobe has been outstanding this season although the tanning is a little over the top.

7. Plans for Lilly's birthday party. It is really anti-climactic for all of my friends and their children because I involve them in the brainstorming, overly-involved crafts, and menu-planning. Last year, I even assigned them all actual jobs at the party. Luckily, they are gracious enough to show up and act excited.

8. The grand opening of the Grand Lux Cafe on November 30.

9. All the other restaurants I want to go to and what I will order.

10. Local newscasters and their personal lives, in which I am very interested.

11. The Food Network. Because, y'all, it is SO AMAZING. I am constantly searching for the perfect occasion to have a clambake and serve Ina's chocolate cake with REAL, OH GOSH IT'S REAL AND MAY SIMULATE HEAVEN buttercream frosting.

So now, in a horrible stroke of irony, I've just ruled out 11 more topics that will no longer catch you by surprise when I try to banter in Real Conversation about our fun lives.

DANG!

The internet can be so tricky sometimes.