In Honor of Which We Gained 30 Pounds

Oh man, just when I'd sworn off food until 2010, we ate enough for a family of twelve at the Grand Lux Cafe.

Even though Brad's 30th birthday came on the heels of the most gluttonous time of the year, it would be a bit anti-climactic to celebrate with a piece of grilled chicken along with a side of steamed vegetables followed by Sugar-Free Jell-o. Wrong, just wrong, and SO not Brad. (Who, I believe, has never eaten steamed vegetables or grilled chicken voluntarily.)

We're reaching for the very high bar set by ourselves in our 2008 Goal Setting Strategery Session which disallowed any repeat ordering at the Grand Lux until we try every menu item.

Because we just STRIVE for excellence around here.

Which is what prompted Brad to order the Chicken Pot Pie:

No, your eyes do not deceive you. It is actually the size and weight of a two year-old. And TASTY. As a conservative estimate, there are probably three entire chickens in there. Along with an entire farm's yield of carrots, peas, pearl onions, and creamy goodness that is indescribable without sound effects.

This is when I wish I was a food critic or had a more discerning palate because I have NO EARTHLY IDEA what made that sauce so out of this world delicious.

Brad's guess: "Cream of chicken soup."

Um, no. Unless it's a new form of Campbell's laced with crack that I haven't tried yet.

I had a few bites myself, and now confidently feel free to abstain from dinner preparation for the rest of the week while we devour every last morsel that took THREE ENTIRE TAKE-OUT CONTAINERS to bring home.

Also, don't be alarmed if I walk around with my pants unbuttoned.

BUT WAIT! THERE'S MORE!

Chicken pot pie was not even the highlight. That honor goes to dessert.

This is one area of the menu that we are getting darn close to conquering. There are only a few desserts on the menu left to try and I am downright ashamed to admit this one was so low on the totem pole.

Enter candy bar pie:
Sorry for the scant photo offering, but we had already devoured it with the passion and intensity of cannibals by the time I had the camera ready to shoot.

Because, you see, it was like heaven on earth and more specficially, heaven in my mouth. The bottom was a crunchy chocolate crust, layered with caramel, more chocolate, peanuts, even more chocolate, and toasted marshmallows.

Sound like a Snickers? EXACTAMUNDO. Except way better than any Snickers I've ever tasted and the top chocolate layer was warm and gooey and slid right down my throat and onto my thighs.

Lilly, however, was far more interested in the makeshift whip cream cake. For reasons which cause me to question our genetic relationship, she was not distracted by the chocolate like the rest of the posse.

If you feel heavier just reading this post, rest assured that one of Brad's birthday gifts was a gym membership.

At which we will be spending the remainder of 2008.